Baseball Anecdotes

[Old Sweater]

Please feel free to add more as I can't get enough of them.

http://www.baseball-almanac.com/humor1.shtml

Anecdotes Appear Alphabetically
After being snubbed from the All-Star game by Boston manager Darrell Johnson, Baltimore's Jim Palmer claimed he was misquoted for calling Johnson an idiot.
"I did not call Johnson an idiot. Someone else did and I just agreed," Palmer said.

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An interviewer started to ask Yogi Berra about his two hits from the previous night when Berra corrected him and said he had three hits.

The interviewer apologized. "I checked the paper and the boxscore said you had two hits. The third must have been a typographical error."

"Hell, no," Berra replied. "It was clean single to left."

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A reporter wanted to know where Alex Johnson's power surge came from. "Last year, you hit two homers and this year you have seven. What's the difference?"

"Five," Johnson replied.

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A rookie sat next to his manager and watched Roger Maris gun down a runner trying to go from first to third.

"Kid, you won't see a throw like that again in a million years."

Three innings later, Maris duplicated the feat.

The rookie turned to the manager and said, "Time sure flies up here in the Majors."

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Asked the age of his two elderly pinch-hitters - Vic Davalillo and Manny Mota - Los Angeles manager Tommy Lasorda shrugged.

"I don't know but somebody told me they were waiters at the last supper."

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Before a series, St. Louis manager Frankie Frisch instructed his pitching staff to avoid throwing Brooklyn's Tony Cuccinello a fastball.

Dizzy Dean objected. "He can't hit my fastball."

He begged Frisch to let him throw Cuccinello a fastball. Frisch refused. Finally with the game in hand, he relented. Dean threw Cuccinello a fastball. Cuccinello hit it out of the park.

Dean turned to Frisch. "By gosh, Frankie. You were right for once."


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Before the 1952 World Series, Brooklyn Dodgers' manager Charlie Dressen cornered pitcher Billy Loes.

"I see in the paper where you picked the Yankees to beat us in seven games. What's wrong with you," Dressen said.

"I was misquoted," Loes protested. "I picked them in six games."

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Bob Gibson, known for his sarcastic wit, caught teammate Curt Flood off guard with a rare compliment as Gibson watched him take batting practice."Way to hit the ball, roomie. If I could hit the ball that way, I'd take off my toeplate and retire from pitching," Gibson said.

Flood smiled.
"In fact, roomie,'' Gibson continued, "If I hit the way you do, I think I'd also retire from baseball."

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Casey Stengel sat in the dugout with Bob Cerv. Several moments passed before Stengel spoke. "Nobody knows this, but one of us has just been traded to Kansas City."

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Del Ennis popped up with the bases loaded, sending manager Fred Hutchinson into a slow burn. After Ennis dropped his bat into the rack, Hutchinson fetched it.

He angrily took a swing at the concrete dugout steps. Nothing happened. Two more swings produced nothing more than dents in the bat.

Hutch calmly walked to where Ennis sat and dropped the bat at his feet.

"Keep it," he said. "It's got good wood."

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Dick Allen launched a home run that cleared two-deck Connie Mack Stadium, impressing Pittsburgh's Willie Stargell.

"Now, I know why they boo Richie all the time. When he hits a home run, there's no souvenir."

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"(Joe) DiMaggio seldom showed emotion. One day after striking out, he came into the dugout and kicked the ball bag. We (Jerry Coleman while playing with the Yankees) all went "ooooh". It really hurt. He sat down and the sweat popped out on his forehead and he clenched his fists without ever saying a word. Everybody wanted to howl, but he was a god. You don't laugh at gods."

Former manager Alvin Dark was asked to compare teams he managed over the years.

"With the A's we depended upon pitching and speed to win. With the Giants we depended upon pitching and power to win. With the Indians we depended upon an act of God."

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"I'll (Phil Rizzuto) never forget September 6, 1950. I got a letter threatening me, Hank Bauer, Yogi Berra and Johnny Mize. It said if I showed up in uniform against the Red Sox I'd be shot. I turned the letter over to the FBI and told my manager Casey Stengel about it. You know what Casey did? He gave me a different uniform and gave mine to Billy Martin. Can you imagine that! Guess Casey thought it'd be better if Billy got shot."

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Johnny Blanchard sat in the Yankees clubhouse crying after learning he had been traded to Kansas City. Concerned for his teammate, Mickey Mantle sat down and tried to console Blanchard.

"Don't take it so hard, John. Just think, in Kansas City you're going to get a chance to play."

"Hell, I can't play, Mick. That's why I'm crying."

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Los Angeles third baseman Pedro Guerrero committed several hard-to-believe fielding errors during one game. This was during the same time that Dodgers' second baseman Steve Sax was undergoing his horrendous and well-publicized fielding slump in which he couldn't throw the most routine ball to first without trouble.

In the post-game meeting, Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda was at a loss with Guerrero. "What are you thinking out there," Lasorda asked.

"Two things," Guerrero said.

"What's the first thing?"

"God, don't let them hit the ball to me."

"And what's the other thing," Lasorda said.

"Don't let them hit the ball to (Steve) Sax."

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On a windy day in San Francisco, third baseman Rocky Bridges called for a popup. He drifted past the shortstop, past the pitcher on the mound, past the second baseman. Finally, he was standing next to first baseman Vic Power as the ball fell four feet behind them.

The next day, the newspaper ran a string of song parodies, one targeting Bridges:

"A tisket, a tasket. I should have brought a basket."

Bridges awaited the writer in the clubhouse the following day. "Hey you, c'mon over here. I read what you wrote in the paper."

"And?"

"And it bothered me so much I couldn't sleep last night. I've got to ask you... How does the tune to that song go?"

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On June 17, 1962, in a game between the Mets and the Cubs at the Polo Grounds,
"Marvelous" Marv Thronberry slammed a two-run triple. But while he was catching his breath on third base, Chicago firstbaseman Ernie Banks called for the ball and appealed that Marv had missed first base. The appeal was upheld and he was called out. Mets manager Casey Stengel ran out from the dugout to argue the call until umpire Dusty Boggess said, "Forget it Casey.He didn't touch second either!"

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On July 15, 1973, the Angels' Nolan Ryan pitches his second career no-hitter (and his second of the season), a 6-0 shutout versus the Tigers in Detroit, with a major league record seventeen strikeouts in a no-hitter.

The "Ryan Express" was so on that day, Norm Cash came to the plate with two
outs in the ninth inning and resorts to using a piano leg to get a hit. Home plate
umpire Ron Luciano, nearly falling down laughing at this ruse, makes him use
a real bat. Cash flied out to left-field, ending the game.

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Pedro Guerrero, while playing with St. Louis, had no problems with management's desire to put his less-than-stellar glove in left field.

"Isn't that a mistake," a reporter asked Guerrero.

"It's already a mistake if the ball's hit my way," he replied.

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Phil Masi was catching one day when Al Javery faced the Giants. The first three hitters all ripped hits on Javery's first pitch. Casey Stengel popped out of the dugout for a conference on the mound.
"What kind of pitches has he been throwing," Stengel asked Masi.
"I dunno," Masi said. "I haven't caught one yet."

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Pittsburgh infielder Gene Freese recalled a day when first baseman Dick Stuart, nicknamed Dr. Strangeglove, had a particularly trying day. Stuart had missed the first three grounders that came his way, but perfectly speared the fourth. However, in his haste to wave off the pitcher, he slung the ball down the right-field line.
"We'd have had the guy at third," Freese said, "But I was laughing too hard."

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Pirates manager Danny Murtaugh couldn't resist a jab at Dick Stuart. After the public address announcer warned fans that "Anyone who interferes with the ball in play will be ejected from the ballpark," Murtaugh replied, "I hope Stuart doesn't think that means him."

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Pitcher Bill Werle got Bill Nicholson to hit a high infield popup in front of the mound. As trained, he called for an infielder to make the play. "Eddie's got it! Eddie's got it!," he yelled.

Then, he watched the ball fall untouched as catcher Eddie Fitzgerald, first baseman Eddie Stevens and third baseman Eddie Bockman looked on.

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Pitcher Don Sutton offered the best description to the Pirates' hitters of the 1970's, who were known as the Lumber Company.

"Some teams watch a pitcher and say, 'Oh boy, here comes a fastball.' Others say, 'Oh boy, here comes a curveball.' The Pirates say, 'Oh boy, here comes a baseball.'"

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The Athletics pounded pitcher Bobo Newsom, taking an 8-0 lead in the fifth inning. Newsom entered his dugout and slammed his glove against the wall.

"What's eating you," a teammate asked.

"How the hell can a guy win when you don't give him any runs," Newsom answered.

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Told to get a statement from the Giants' Dominican players after Generalissmo Trujillo was assassinated in the Dominican Republic, a reporter came back from the clubhouse and approached his editor.

"They said they didn't do it."

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When Joe Pepitone first came to the Cubs, he told manager Leo Durocher he was fast enough to steal. So the first time Pepitone reached first, Durocher decided to test him. First base coach Peanuts Lowery flashed the sign to Pepitone - a wink. Pepitone didn't budge. So Lowery winked again. Still, Pepitone stood pat. Again, Lowery winked. This time, Pepitone responded. He blew Lowery a kiss.

[Old Sweater]

http://razzball.com/baseball-flakes-...ther-oddities/

Going back to the long-lost days of my youth, I have always been captivated by baseball lore and anecdotes. In one of the first books I devoured on the subject listed the players that were found worthy of enshrinement in the Hall of Fame. I was fascinated by this list, reading over and over again the names of baseball’s immortals, as well as their statistical exploits. At the bottom of the list was a ballplayer named Robert (Rabbit) Maranville. I couldn’t quite understand how a player with a .258 lifetime batting average and no appreciable power, could have been voted into this elite group. After doing considerable research, I continue to have some issues with his worthiness. However, I also discovered Rabbit to be one of the most engaging eccentrics in the history of our National Pastime.

Maranville was the Harpo Marx of the infield. He would mock slow pitchers, yawning, and stretching on the mound. He checked an illusory stopwatch. He stretched out against an imaginary wall when on first base, and would slowly topple on the bag, pretending to fall asleep. He also would make fun of large, ponderous sluggers at the plate, mimicking their motions. Of course, he didn’t neglect the umpires: he would mimic every move the umpire made; from shifting his mask, going down in a crouch, sweeping the plate. The crowd would laugh with glee. He once pulled out a pair of eye glasses when up at bat, to assist the ump in calling balls and strikes. Once, when legendary umpire Bill Klem was calling the game, Rabbit stepped out of the batter’s box, lining himself in back of the catcher. “I just wanted to see where you stood, Bill, to call that last one a strike.” (Let it be noted that Klem once stated that eyesight was overrated in evaluating an umpire’s expertise.) Even the umpires at times had to call time out, as they couldn’t control their laughter. Once he was thrown out of the game for throwing a roundhouse punch at an ump – a not uncommon occurrence in those days. He later returned to the field, apologized profusely, offered to treat the bruises with iodine, and smeared streaks of iodine all over the ump’s face. But his most outrageous antic on the ball field was when he staged a murder, complete with gunshot, in Ebbets Field during a game. Even the Brooklyn crowd, who were used to daffy incidents such as three men on a base at the same time, was in a state of shock.

Rabbit also performed more dangerous acts under the influence, like walking hotel ledges. On one occasion, teammate and drinking buddy Jim Thorpe allegedly held him by one arm as Rabbit dangled 15 stories from a hotel room. On one occasion, the diminutive 5’3″ Rabbit needled the powerful Olympian to such a rage that he chased him throughout Boston; Rabbit escaped by climbing up a tree. Thorpe waited at the bottom of the tree. However, the alcohol had its effect, and Thorpe fell asleep. The agile Rabbit climbed into an upper story window, and started bombarding apples off of Thorpe’s noggin. An enraged Thorpe tried to uproot the tree while Rabbit quietly escaped out the back door. Of course, the most famous escapade was the night that Thorpe and Rabbit were observed swinging from the branches of trees, yowling like banshees, with Jim shouting “I’m Tarzan” and the Rabbit “I’m little Tarzan.” They apparently kept this up all night.

Rabbit had his own version of Willie Mays’ “bread-basket catch” or ”vest-pocket” catch of infield pop-ups. He would cup his hands, resting on his belt buckle as the ball skimmed by his peaked cap, strike him in his chest, and roll down his shirt into his glove. One may call this the ultimate in showboating, which of course it was, but old-timers of that period could not report a single instance where Maranville botched the play. He was that good.

Pete Browning is considered one of the outstanding sluggers of the 19th century. Browning is best known for ordering the first custom made bat from the Hillerich & Bradsby Company in 1884, known then and now as the famous Louisville Slugger. He apparently single-handedly kept the company in business throughout his career. His collection included something like 700 bats; each one he cherished, spoke words of encouragement to, and was otherwise lovingly attentive to, and christened each with a Biblical name. Pete later retired them in his home; he believed that each bat contained a certain amount of hits - these were what he deemed his “active” bats – and he examined each Louisville slugger in order to see whether it was a “magical” stick with hits in it. The bats themselves were enormous: 37″ long, and 48 ounces in weight.

Browning displayed behaviors which could best be described as outlandish. He was known to stare at the sun for long periods of time, believing that by doing so, he would strengthen his “lamps” (eyes). He also believed that his eyes periodically needed to be “cleansed,” which could best be accomplished by sticking his head out the window when traveling on a train, in an effort to catch cinders in them. His eccentric behavior later devolved into psychosis, and he unfortunately spent his last years committed to an asylum.

Insanity is a frequent theme in baseball lore. More than fifty years after Browning was wasting away in a psychiatric institution, a colorful outfielder named Jimmy Piersall roamed centerfield with grace and skill. Piersall was always a popular flake, but at some point his eccentric behavior became bizarre and frightening. On one occasion, Piersall was ejected by the umpire for arguing after striking out. Prior to his at-bat, he had acknowledged teammate Milt Bolling’s home run by spraying a water pistol on home plate. Piersall then moved to the grandstand roof to heckle home plate umpire Neil Strocchia. Soon afterwards, he was committed to a psychiatric institution. After discharge, he continued his delightfully eccentric behavior: he once stepped up to bat wearing a Beatles wig and playing “air guitar” on his bat, led cheers for himself in the outfield during breaks in play, and “talked” to Babe Ruth behind the center field monuments at Yankee Stadium. On one occasion, when playing against the Yankees, the preceding two batters were hit by the Yankee hurler. When Piersall came up to bat, he turned around to catcher Yogi Berra, and stated: “Yogi, if your pitcher hits me, I am going to charge the mound and brain him with my bat. Everyone knows that I am crazy, and I will be let off the hook.” Yogi calmly replied: “I wouldn’t worry about it. We never try to bean .250 hitters.” In his autobiography, Piersall commented, “Probably the best thing that ever happened to me was going nuts. Who ever heard of Jimmy Piersall, until that happened?”

During the time of the Great Dust Bowl, Sportsman Park in St. Louis was often covered with a fine layer of dust. The heat during this period was brutal and constant. At one point, for 30 straight days, temperatures were 100 degrees or more. One day during this intolerable spell, St. Louis Cardinal pitcher Dizzy Dean built a fire in front of the Cards dugout. He procured two blankets, stomped the earth, and let out blood-curdling war cries in between yips. Dean then pantomimed rain coming down from the skies, took out an imaginary umbrella, and received applause going back to the dugout. During the World Series of 1934, Dean was sent into the game as a substitute base runner. On a ball to the shortstop Billy Rogell, Dizzy roared into second base but did not slide. Rogell’s throw hit him squarely on the head and Dizzy fell “like a marionette whose string had snapped” and lay motionless on the infield dirt. The ball was thrown so hard it bounced 50 ft. into the air. But Diz revived and left the field, and was taken to the hospital. The headlines next day read:

“X-Rays taken of Dean’s head – nothing found.”

Several days removed from the hospital, Dean came back to pitch game five. When he reached the mound, a fan raced onto the field to present him with a mediaeval armor helmet.

One can’t write an article on baseball flakes without including Rube Waddell, described by John Thorn as “The Peter Pan of Baseball.” There are literally scores of tales concerning Waddell’s exploits, on and off the field, and most of them are true.

“(Waddell) began that year (1903) sleeping in a firehouse in Camden New Jersey, and ended it tending bar in a saloon in Wheeling West Virginia. In between those events he won 22 games for the Philadelphia Athletics, played left end for the Business Men’s Rugby Football Club of Grand Rapids, toured the nation in a melodrama called The Stain of Guilt, courted, married and became separated from May Wynne Skinner of Lynn, Massachusetts, saved a woman from drowning, accidentally shot a friend through the hand, and was bitten by a lion.”

Lee Allen – Cooperstown historian, describing a year in the life of Rube Waddell.

Rube Waddell often showed his delight in striking out the side by doing cartwheels on the field. He would be distracted by the opposition, who would wave shiny objects in his face. He would change his uniform as he ran across the diamond into the clubhouse after games, which usually drew roars from the crowd, as the Rube never wore underwear. He sometimes disappeared when he was scheduled to pitch; he could be found playing marbles with the kids outside the park, or at times in the village saloon; or sometimes at his favorite fishing hole. One time, he disappeared for several days in the midst of a tight pennant race, and returned to the team as if nothing had occurred, offering manager Connie Mack several catfish he had caught. When a fire truck passed by mid-game, he was said to drop everything and run after it; his favorite hobby was putting out fires. (Rube allegedly saved the lives of 13 people, assisting in various disasters.) He would pour ice over his arm before the game, stating that if he didn’t do so his speed would burn a hole in the mitt of his equally flaky catcher, Ossee Schreckengost. When he felt especially frisky, he would call the outfield in, and proclaim that he was going to strike out the side. And most of the times he would. Often Ossie would catch Rube’s heater, rated to be the equal of any in the game, bare-handed.

Rube also loved to wrestle. In 1904, the Boston Red Sox and Waddell’s Philadelphia A’s were in the midst of a tough pennant race. The Red Sox conspired to have their biggest player, Candy LaChance, challenge Rube to a wrestling match before the game. LaChance slapped Rube first in the belly, then the shoulders, and the match began. They wrestled for quite awhile, until Rube picked up LaChance, hoisted him over his head, and slammed him to the ground. Candy begged off playing the game; Rube went out and pitched a two-hitter. In 1905, Waddell engaged the great Cy Young in one of the greatest pitching duels of all time: Rube gave up two runs in the first inning, Cy returned the two in the 6th, and then both threw blanks, until an Athletic crossed the plate in the 20th inning. Rube won the game 3-2, pitching 20 consecutive scoreless innings. Waddell later parlayed the ball for free booze at the local tavern. It was said that more than 50 bars across the country claimed to have the ball that beat the Cyclone.

Connie Mack, Waddell’s manager and caretaker, called Rube the greatest pitcher, in terms of pure talent, he had ever seen—and Connie had seen them all, from Hoss Radbourne and Amos Rusie through Cy Young and Walter Johnson, on up to Lefty Grove and Bob Feller. Mack once said, “The Rube has a two million dollar body and a two cent head.”

Waddell died in 1914 at age 37 after contracting a viral infection while stacking sandbags at a flood site. His battery-mate Ossee Schreckengost, who once had a stipulation put in Waddell’s contract that forbade him from eating crackers in bed, and also once nailed a steak to the wall of a tavern when it was not to his liking, was the only player at his funeral. He provided the insightful epitaph for the headstone, “Rube Waddell had only one priority, to have a good time.”